Back to Blogging: Aristotle and the Golden Mean Part 2

Disclaimer: please see Part 1 of this entry for any of this to make sense!

Now that I’ve explained this tidbit of Aristotelian philosophy, hopefully you can see how my average organization abilities as the result of my attempts at becoming extra-organized directly reflect Aristotle’s commentary on how to achieve the Golden Mean: I am not naturally organized, so I shoot for the opposite extreme and land in the middle.

Though I think this method in attaining the Golden Mean is interesting and rooted in truth, I would also like to add some advice that speaks to the contrary. I will offer my advice in the context of my particular problem: organization, or lack there of. Since I am naturally somewhat scatterbrained, I have to put in much more effort in shooting for the opposite extreme of organization than someone who is naturally date-oriented and gets stressed out not knowing their schedule a week in advance. I propose that the disproportionate amounts of energy I have to expend to reach the same outcome as someone who is naturally organized  could be put to better use by channeling them into a few key strategies and then forgetting about the rest. 

I have found that there are a few specific habits that help me counteract my natural inclination to “go with the flow” and avoid having concrete plans. I practice responding to emails as soon as I see them, I use a planner for school assignments and events, and put meetings and appointments into my calendar on my phone that automatically sends me reminders. These are simple things I can do that have become routine for me that help me counteract my nature as a disorganized person, without putting excessive stress on myself. At first I had to constantly put energy into remembering to do these things, but eventually it became habit. I don’t have to constantly shake the feeling that I am forgetting something anymore. I don’t stress myself out every day wondering whether or not all my calendars are 100% in order, although I do still stress about emails sometimes (Emails are the bane of my existence). I propose that the only way to make these key strategies work, no matter what aspect of life you are trying to cultivate, is to put energy into applying them daily until they become a habit. Once your key strategies are a habit, I say forget about the rest and channel that energy into something you are naturally good at. Putting energy into your strengths is easier and usually yields more noticeable results than pouring energy into a weakness for only slight improvement. My mom is a Strengths Coach, and this is a point she advocates for fiercely! 

Some people definitely do hate their weaknesses, and are successful at working tirelessly at them until they improve. I respect those peoples’ work ethics and refusal to give up; however, I think the method that I discussed above with a few key strategies and focus on personal strengths is a lot more realistic. I also think people are more likely to follow through with their goals of improvement when they don’t immediately expect perfection from themselves. If I had to sum up both paths to the Golden Mean, or paths to successful improvement, I would say Aristotle’s strategy is “Go big or go home,” and mine is “Start small.” I realize that comparing these two ideas might not be fair, since Aristotle is talking more about personality traits and changing your mindset than he is about new skills, but oh well. I think that the key strategies/“start small” approach is a little bit more kind-hearted and forgiving, and it tends to help people stick with their goals instead of fall off the wagon and never get back on. I heard this story about forgiving mistakes when you are working towards a goal in an email from I Am That Girl, an organization I am a part of: “If you accidentally shatter your phone by dropping it, pick it up and resolve not to drop it again. Don’t keep continually slamming your phone on the ground because its a ‘lost cause.’” What good insight! This supports the “start small” strategy because if you are building new habits and you make a mistake, its no big deal! You are only starting small and mistakes are expected. If you are aiming for the opposite extreme, and “going big or going home,” you are expecting perfection right away, and it is much easier to be discouraged by mistakes early on. Hopefully you guys understand how this relates, and this isn’t all a big jumble.

In my blog’s case, or writing for me in general I have always felt the need to “polish” and edit pieces or ideas I want to post. I have so many unfinished drafts like this one that sit around for months at a time. I go over different passages that I wrote hundreds of times, and always come to the conclusion that they are not clear enough, cohesive enough, or interesting enough to post. But you know what? Thats kinda stupid. I realize that if I want to keep going and making progress, I can’t immediately expect perfection, and I’m going to have to “start small.” Which method do you prefer?

Back to Blogging: Aristotle and The Golden Mean Part 1

Honestly I am very disappointed in the extent to which I used my blog this semester! (I finalized and re-edited this entry which I originally wrote in December. It is now June. I am still disappointed in my lack of blog posts to say the least.) I mean really! I journal all the time! Okay I don’t. But I journal at least once a month, and I have only posted a total of two things on my blog in at least a 4 month (now 10 month) span. Sheesh. (Yikes.)

I think internally shouting at myself things like Get your life together Frances, collect yourself, what the heck are you doing??? You have followers who are relying on you to post consistent content! would be pretty silly of me. First of all because who am I kidding: I don’t have any avid followers who wouldn’t like me if I stopped posting. That part is just not true. I only made this blog accessible to people who are close friends who love me regardless of the frequency and consistency of my blog posts. And second of all, I really don’t think I need to focus on organizing my life to be happier, I think I need to work more at being comfortable and working through a constant mess. My life is pretty much constantly organized chaos, like a fruit salad :) , and I’m working on embracing that! 

If you are like me, it is extremely hard for you to organize multiple parts of your life, balance time, think ahead, and make and keep appointments or plans to hang out with friends. It is especially hard for me to respond to emails in advance and make sure I don’t miss online deadlines for homework assignments. I often don’t complete tasks unless there is a hard deadline; internal deadlines and planning ahead often go out the window for me. Something about me just gives off the vibe that my head is in the clouds, but at the same time I am always in the moment, lacking thought about the next week or the next month. (I’m sorry I realize that not everyone can relate here!)

I have gone through plenty of phases where I give myself serious metal talks where I tell myself that this month/week/year/day, whatever it is, I will become the most reliable and well-organized person I know. I usually spend long periods of time writing dates into a calendar, synching my phone, organizing and cleaning out my inbox of old emails, making lists of things I need to do, and feeling absolutely overwhelmed by the tidal waves of things to remember. (Actually this hasn’t happened to me in a while, maybe because I am taking my advice I offered in this entry). And after all this effort and stress, I usually only come out to be about the average level of organization of an everyday teen.

In my opinion, this idea relates a ton to what Aristotle says about the Golden Mean. 

Here is what Wikipedia has to say about the Golden Mean, “In Ancient Greek philosophy, especially that of Aristotle, the golden mean or golden middle way is the desirable middle between two extremes, one of excess and the other of deficiency. For example, in the Aristotelian view, courage is a virtue, but if taken to excess would manifest as recklessness, and, in deficiency, cowardice.” In other words, the Golden Mean is basically the idea that you want to possess just the right amount of each personality trait, no more and no less, in order to be your best self. The quote uses courage as an example. Behaving with courage is a good thing, but behaving with extreme courage would cause you to be reckless, and not having enough courage would be cowardice. Easy, right? Look at you understanding philosophy and shit!

Courage is probably the easiest of all traits to apply this idea to because it is clearly not beneficial to be either a coward or a reckless person. What about other traits that are not necessarily bad in extreme or deficiency? Can you be too witty, or on the other hand, not witty enough? I slipped this question in here since I think its an important one when contemplating the idea of the Golden Mean, but I will not be discussing it here. If you have anything to say on it, maybe leave me a comment? I’d be interested to hear! I have been thinking recently about whether or not this idea applies to honesty, which has interesting implications.

Aristotle includes plenty of traits that he thinks are important to being the best self possible, for example friendliness, modesty, and a bunch of other really obscure words that are apparently character traits; however, the one I would like to focus on is organization, which unfortunately didn’t achieve Aristotle-list status. (Here are some of the traits that are supposedly on Aristotle’s list. Also, fun fact, Aristotle refers to a lack of the trait ambition as sloth. LOL.)  Aristotle furthers his idea of the golden mean by prescribing a method to achieve this golden middle way for people who are on either the high or low side of the personality spectrum. He advises these people to shoot for the opposite extreme in order to land in the middle. 

We will continue using the example of courage to apply this idea. Say we are dealing with a coward, named Billy. Lets say Billy struggles to muster the courage to make new friends. Billy, in order to achieve the golden mean of courage, should, instead of making an effort to simply be more courageous, attempt to behave with abandon and be completely reckless. So Billy sees a prospective new friend, and thinks to himself What would a reckless, crazy person do? Probably just go right up to him and talk to him without even having a good reason to start a conversation! Oh my gosh I’m going to do it this is insane! Billy successfully acts with courage and makes a new friend! Everyone wins, yay! Whereas if Billy were attempting only to be courageous, and not shooting for recklessness, he likely would have shuffled over to this stranger and mumbled something like, “So how about the weather today?” coughed a few times, and walked away because that would have been courageous to him. If a different person named Sally were extremely reckless and aiming for average levels of courage, she would have to attempt to be a completely cowardly and boring person. Sally might think, Hm what would a complete and utter, coward do in this situation… Probably not go skydiving without a parachute. If Sally were only aiming to be courageous, she might have chosen to skydive without a parachute because her reckless and carefree nature would have made this seem normal to her. (Credit to a high school philosophy teacher who used this example to explain this idea!)

I really appreciate Aristotle’s insight to personality traits because I think its a very accurate depiction about the human experience, rather than rational, emotionless, philosophy that you have to work very hard at understanding in order to apply it well to everyday life (but I don’t discourage you from trying!). This method to achieving the Golden Mean is also valuable in that it helps to broaden perspective. What may seem easy to you could be extremely difficult to someone else. What may seem wildly courageous to you may be normal relative to someone else’s experience. Aristotle ultimately advises a change in mindset from what you are comfortable with to be able to make a change.

Bro, I'm so High Right Now

Ha-ha please tell me you get that the title is just a joke. I am physically high right now because I'm in an airplane, not whatever else you happened to think I was talking about! Besides, I prefer to get high on life :/ 

It always befuddles me that people would rather sit in the aisle than the window seat in airplanes. The smile-inducing speed and the world displayed outside unfolds itself like a red carpet from the window seat. To put it very simply, its freaking COOL. Clearly it is the better choice. Why would you waste your time staring at a dingy TV screen to watch a movie you could see when your feet are planted on solid ground instead of on the inside of a giant metal bird hurtling through the atmosphere at speeds close to 600 mph? I mean technically I’m wasting every precious second of the view to write this journal but hey, I had some thoughts I thought would be worth sharing.

I was thinking about how to describe the feeling of awe that I think stems from the pure vastness of the planet to someone who wouldn’t have the opportunity to fly in an airplane, and I really don’t think that its possible unless I could compare it to the ocean. If someone hadn’t had the pleasure of observing the vast and magical ocean from any sort of vantage point, they might just be fresh out of luck. Speaking of people who haven’t had the opportunity to travel/see things brings me to another reason the window seat is objectively the best place to sit: I feel that its a responsibility to take advantage of the rare opportunities given to me to observe things that so many others can’t in order to show gratitude. There are probably at least a million kids around the world who dream of being pilots their wholes lives and go to sleep thinking about what it would like to be among the clouds. I would feel like a brat if I plonked myself in the aisle seat because it was “closer to the bathroom” or “more convenient” or “had more leg room.”

So, for my own benefit as a writer, and for all the people who may not have had the chance to fly in an airplane, here is my best description of the sky, as it looks throughout my flight, in the funkiest terms I can think of (cause I know descriptive passages where the clouds are described as cotton balls and cars are compared to ants are cliche to the max). 

A silvery tingle of excitement wiggled from the crown of my head to the bottom of my spine. I love when it feels like your head and shoulders are disconnecting from the rest of your body from pure weightlessness and you’re slightly scared for your life! I already had a speed smile and a racing heart from the plane taking off. And, as we ascended into the clouds, I noticed the distinct differences between all the structures we have saddled the earth with. They look like insignificant toys from up here. First you have the developed complexes of houses that look like a mixture of geometric Native American patterns and minute lego blocks lined up in spindly patterns. You never realize the extent to which each housing complex is the result of a cookie-cutter design, picked up and stamped on the earth over and over. When you’re driving through them they seem natural, with windy roads and hills, but when you fly over them you realize how calculated they are. Everything seems so small that I feel clumsy just looking at them; I mean I feel like I could crush a whole neighborhood with the fingertip of my pinky! Next I noticed several enormous bodies of water, which were amoebas swaying gently back and forth in a gentle ocean current, but frozen on the spot. The farm land was super interesting. It definitely wasn’t as sharply defined or geometric as the housing developments. The patches were more like magazine cut outs, each with different colors and shapes, blurred together like a mosaic of melting green skittles. The patches of farm land seemed to hug each other in a way that meant they were all coexisting sentient beings, whereas the houses were all obedient cells, who weren’t really working together because none of them had a mind of their own. I could only personify the houses while looking at them as a whole picture. Now take all three of these ideas and imagine them strung out to infinity, until they disappear into the hazy horizon. Its shiver-inducing just from pure magnitude! Perhaps it is inaccurate to personify the housing developments as impersonal and robotic and the lakes and farmland as natural, happy-go-lucky things. I do realize that there is a huge problem with the way we farm animals with tons of antibiotics, etc. Farms definitely aren't always good for the environment. CAFOs (Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations) are also pretty fricked up, and there is tons of debate over the most efficient and/or sustainable farming practices. So, please take my words for what they are, along with this acknowledgment.

I like to think about the earth as her own being (which is the beginnings of a super interesting concept called the Gaia Hypothesis. Definitely check it out!). In keeping with this idea, I thought about all the structures built onto the planet as scars on the earth’s skin. And let me tell ya, humans are the worst case of facial acne ever. The thing that got me thinking about this was a rock quarry I saw, that took the deepest and widest straight chunk out of the earth I have seen, and all I could think of was “Ow.”

There was this lovely moment when the nose of the plane finally battled its way through the lowest level of clouds, which dared not to go lower than the bottom shelf of the atmosphere. The clouds scuttled along the top of this invisible barrier like water bugs on a pond. The clouds then proceeded to dissuade me from describing them as anything else other than chunky piles of cottage cheese divided into dollops and spread in an endless buffet line. The sky was doing the most beautiful ombre thing. The center of the sky was borderline navy, in the most regal way possible, fading gradually into the white of the clouds in a way that suggested that the clouds were giving off a faint luminous glow. Finally the clouds joined together into a soothing wool blanket that covered every square inch of the sleeping planet. “Calm down earth, it'll all be gucci,” the clouds said.

Not only are the views from (the six lol get it cause…? yeah anyways.) way up here in the big ole sky absolutely fantastic, 10/10 would recommend, I feel like they can give a great perspective on life! I thought about how tiny a building looked from way up here, and this was right after we took off, mind you. I just can’t imagine having a daily life where the majority of my time would be spent in one little building like that one. From a plane, I can see not only the whole building as about the size of a grain of rice, but the whole city. I can see the shapes of lakes and the beauty of a highway. How puny is that potential desk-job person sitting at that diminutive desk, looking at a microscopic monitor,  in a rat-hole room, in a heinous hallway of that b-small building (went a bit overboard on the alliteration there, my b)? In case you’re not getting my point, the desk-job person in my description is really freaking small. I think about my poor little brain being only occupied by the fact that I have lots of emails and grown-up things to do, in my small world which is encompas sed in an approximately 10 mile radius, and forgetting that there is probably at least one person sitting up in a plane looking down on my world, passing by in .2 seconds and thinking, “Holy moly everything looks so small!” I think looking at things from the perspective of a plane can help unchain that poor little mind from getting so bogged down in, not only her own personal skull-sized universe (David Foster Wallace talked about a similar concept in his speech, This is Water), but also the nitty-gritty grind of daily life. Cause life is cool and beautiful. Its not supposed to be a living hell where you struggle to get through every day. Unchaining the mind and thinking about things like you’re super fly like an airplane (yes that was a pun) might help remind you that things are bigger than the stresses of daily life. When you think big picture, it makes those metaphorical mountains you’ve been climbing seem like mole hills. Life's not so bad. Cue Carrie Underwood’s So Small.

Ok, so we have established that size matters (lol ;). But like actually, size is really important when you’re a human who thinks only from your own perspective who needs to be reminded that the earth and its atmosphere are slightly humongous. Maybe we don’t all have that concept down pat, but hey, I do my best to incorporate into daily life. But then there are THE CLOUDS: endlessly interesting and ever-changing. I mean those cottage cheese clouds when from wool blanket to desert landscape to obliterator-of-everything in less than 2 hours, man! It was incredible! The clouds got me thinking about what its like to see something off in the distance that seems really far away, but then suddenly be in the midst of it in no time. Thinking about a year seems like an eternity, and I often have these dreamy, uncertain ideas of what I’ll be doing when I think ahead. I love to live in the moment in a way that makes me think of the future as this huge deal that is so far away. For example, for my entire senior year of high school, everyone (including me) hypes up this huge deal called college. I mean, you spend the majority of 6 months crafting applications, stressing, doubting yourself, anxiously awaiting acceptance letters, agonizing over the whole decision, then talking about who is going where, writing “Good luck at (insert college here) next year! I’ll miss you!” in year books, and attempting to enjoy senior year. And then when you spend the summer lounging around or working or going to camp or what-have-you, you start thinking, Man, move-in day is never gonna get here! And without fail, before you know it, and before you’re ready, you are flung into something you spent a whole year thinking you were prepared for. Hey, maybe this doesn’t apply to you though, and thats totally cool! Keep doing your thing! But I feel like this is pretty relatable in terms of high school students, or any other transition in your life you may be going through, and you know what? Its a lot like looking at the clouds! Clouds can seem really far away; they can look like something they aren’t, change really quickly, and surround you or spring upon you in no time, just like your future. I’m not really sure I have a nugget of wisdom for you guys here, but I just thought it was a cool comparison to draw (I love comparisons if you can’t tell). Well, ok, I guess I would say make sure you keep your chin up and scan those clouds so you’re not enveloped by them by surprise. But make sure you understand that the clouds change really quickly and unpredictably, so try not to get too caught up in what you think the clouds are supposed to look like, or “Eek that looks like a storm!” Be as flexible as the wind and blow your future away! It can be a really cool to finally do that thing you imagined doing so many times. Fulfill those dreams! YGG! I hope that I don’t sound preach-y, or like I’m above any of you because I am totally the queen of kingdom Future-which-Suddenly-Became-the-Present-Oh-Shit-I’m-Unprepared. I’m not saying any of this stuff because I’m so old and wise, but because I’m going through this huge soup-y mess of life just like you, and these are some of my motivational observations/thoughts I’d thought I’d share.

Alright I have one more future/cloud comparison thats just too good to pass up! At one point in the flight, I looked out the window and saw what was probably the least aesthetically pleasing view of the flight: pure white. The cloud we were flying through was so thick that all I could see was the tip of the wing and a colonial woman sitting out there churning butter (JK obviously and please watch the airplane scene from bridesmaids if you haven’t. Civil Rights. Its the 90s. Also, fun fact: that entire scene was almost all improv!). But seriously, I could not see a thing. The visibility was so close to zero feet that it reminded me of moments when I just admit to myself I haven’t the slightest clue what I’m doing, and so I give a huge, dumb smile to that third-person camera I always imagine is filming my life. Sometimes it can be a relief to admit that you have no idea what you’re doing! I just had a moment where I thought to myself, The pilots must be shitting themselves. But then I continued to contemplate this, and I’m sure it probably happens to pilots all the time. I mean, it happens as often as there are cloudy days, which is fairly frequently - at least where I’m from. The pilot is probably trained to land planes in the foggiest of fogs. If he or she panicked every time they lost visibility flying would be a stressful experience indeed. What I’m trying to say, perhaps not so subtly, is that its a-okay to not know where you are flying your plane/going in life sometimes! Freaking out is probably the worst thing you can do, and maybe it seems like every other pilot knows exactly where she is flying her plane, but I guarantee you not everyone does. I’m not saying just sit back and hope that your plane lands itself, but freaking out over things that you can’t control is just plane unproductive. You can fill your time by doing your best to learn about yourself, being attentive to your environment, and catching any breaks in the clouds that you can, and I promise you, you will be alright. Land that plane! I know you can! And when you land that plane and spend some time on the ground, take off again and jump into the next thing that absolutely scares the shit out of you :) That’s all for now!

PS: if you enjoyed the part about “unchaining” your mind, and thinking about things from the perspective of a plane, you might really enjoy looking into Baruch Spinoza’s concept of sub specie aeternitatis. Shoutout to Mr. Post, my English and Philosophy teacher of two years, for introducing/teaching Spinoza’s philosophy so well that I am recommending it to other people!

PPS: My teammates are begging me for a shoutout in my blog so I guess I will entertain their requests, *sighs.* JK I am happy to shout them out and let you all know how cool they are! Shout out to Daria for being an amazing (most of the time) roommate and for tolerating my random, deep questions about what a soul even is. Shoutout Paige for being a fun plane buddy and for staying weird and keeping me smiling. Shoutout to Krissi for being so sweet and telling me that I had a good game, after every game without fail. Love em to death :) Deuces!

I LOVE YOU ALL

Hey guys!

You are likely here because you followed the link on my finsta, or maybe you are here simply because you randomly stumbled across my humble blog while surfing the interweb. Either way I would like to do a little 'splaining about what this is!

I struggled for a long time with my infatuation with having a blog because sometimes I think it can be harmful for me to overshare details of my life with a large audience. I can be super sensitive to criticism and others' opinions, and logically having a public blog would open me up to that sort of thing. I also really admire soft-spoken people who can be so peaceful and introverted. I sometimes don't like that I rely so much on other people to think out loud and decide how I feel about things; however, I realized that it is pretty unproductive to try and change or suppress the way I am because I wish I operated differently. I am the way I am, and that's ok! So eventually after some thought, here we are: I have succumbed to the desire of making a blog. Please feel free to comment or message me what you think; I really appreciate feedback!

On the other hand I realized some pretty cool things that come with having a blog! I get to practice my writing, document things I can giggle at later, organize my thoughts, and, perhaps the most important thing: connect with other people. I'm a big believer in the idea that everyone is a weirdo. I think that sometimes people don't want to seem like weirdos because they aren't sure that other people are also weird or they fear that other people won't accept them. I make a big effort to be as honest as possible in my writing, and by being my fully weird, unapologetic self, I hope to help people feel like they can be themselves too!

A few years ago around November/December, I started to get really peeved with the commercialism of the holidays. It felt like all the advertisements catered to, "getting ahead of the game this (insert holiday) season," which implies that the holiday season is all about checking off a list of things to do, all about buying/receiving presents, ingredients, and decorations. I think it's a pretty dangerous track to start thinking, "it would be a great Christmas if I could just get this new pair of shoes." Though the thought, "it would be a great Christmas if I could just buy everyone everything they want," is much more selfless than the first, both are usually pretty good indicators of a certain way of deriving happiness; one that is rooted in material value.

I started to feel like the whole year was just a cycle, a routine that everyone needed to get ahead of. It felt like every year was so busy that people were just constantly going through the motions of appropriate things to do at each time of the year. There is a card in the game Cards Against Humanity that reads, "Getting married, having a few kids, buying some stuff, retiring to Florida, and dying." Though extremely savage, is probably true for a lot of people, which saddens me deeply. I 100% reject the idea that humans were put on this planet simply to go through these motions.

So why are we humans here then? Are we here to better our environment? To organize into political systems? To be happy? Bettering the environment is definitely something we should aim to do, but I would argue that the only reason humans really better the environment is to be happier, or to increase the earth's carrying capacity of life. So if our purpose is to better the environment, what is the result of that? More people or animals existing? I like to think our purpose involves more than just existing. Organizing into political systems is also similar to bettering the environment in that it is a tool we use to increase quality of life or better support more life on earth.

I am willing to entertain the argument that we are here to be as happy as possible, on the most consistent basis. But, a major key (DJ Khaled where you at?) in being happy is other people! I did a thought experiment and thought about all the things that I could go without besides my basic needs like food, shelter, etc. I could do without my closet full of clothes, house that I live in, my car, and lots of other things lots I take for granted. But there was one thing I am positive that I would go crazy without, and that was other people! If I could everything I desired, even in my wildest dreams, I would be wildly unhappy if there was no one to share my success or material wealth with. Similar to Plato's argument against a tyrant's lifestyle in the Republic, I don't think anything really has much value without good relationships with the people around you. I believe humans' main purpose in life is to coexist and lift each other up through connection and compassion.

The thing is, I don't think this belief is unique to me either. I think that if a lot of people thought deeply about this, they would feel the same way. This whole train of thought that began with my Christmas story brings me to my point: I am here to find happiness for sure and gain self knowledge, but this is all only possible because of YOU. Because of every single person walking down a random street in a random place, at a random given hour. Because of all 20,000+ students and faculty at NC State. Because of people who live in different places around the world. I have endless love for every person on this planet, so much love that it sometimes is too much for me. It fills up my little heart, and it often makes me sad when people don't love themselves.

So yeah, that's what I have for today. I mainly just wanted to let all of you know that I love and care for you more than you know<3